The Drunkard went down to Georgia.

This weekend was a wee bit different than last whereas instead of being surrounded by opulence and debauchery, I was surrounded by a lot of stinky animals and poop.  Wait, maybe these weekends are more similar than not.
Did I mention that last weekend someone *may* have thrown up in the hotel sink because the toilet was already occupied?  I didn’t?  Oh.  Well, never mind then.  YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE.

Anyway.

I bopped down to Georgia to visit one quarter of the infamous DB’s, Schell.  She and I didn’t get much time to catch up last week and I can always use a road trip, so what the heck?  We converged on Schell’s parents Emu farm for a night of laughs, Mexican food, companionship and yes, even a little goat smooching.  My soul always shines a little brighter after I spend time with my pal Schell.

They were out of town for the weekend so we decided to watch over the place and get a little R&R.  Her folks own and operate a gorgeous 50 acre farm in Northeast Georgia and it’s a little piece of quiet heaven.

Well, most of the time.  This guy can be really loud when he douches out.  He’s a Rhea, pronounced “ree-uh”, not “ray-uh”.  You know, like “diarrhea“.  And he’s nasty.  Striking, but pretty darn aggressive.  He makes a crazy booming sound that you’d have to hear to believe.

Asshat.

Then there was this little gal.  She *almost* came home in my purse. Seriously, if I could have figured out a way to keep this cutiepie secret from Johnny, I’d would now be hiding her in my sock drawer and in my pillowcase.

I’ve kissed worse.

This little gal is having a hard time nursing and we ended up feeding her with a baby bottle.  Evidently her mother is about as maternal as I am and keeps flinging her away when she tries to suckle.  As Schell relayed this predicament to her Mother via phone, I tried to stifle my laughter when her Mother inquired if I had ever milked a goat.  She must have heard my giggles because the next thing I heard was “No, Jen.  It’s not the same.  It doesn’t get bigger when you touch it”.
BUUUUUUUURN!  I was utterly mortified and totally impressed, simultaneously.
It was a lovely night.  It was cool and crisp, but we were snug in the farmhouse and there’s a certain peace to night time in the county.  The sky is incredibly dark, not like in the city dark, but a deep blackness that is hard to describe unless you’ve stared up at it.  Dusk is beautiful as well.  I enjoyed every moment of this escape.

I’m home where I belong tonight but am well rested and happy to have had such a relaxing and joyous opportunity.  From the bright lights of Vegas to the stillness of a country farm in just seven days.  What a lucky girl I am.
Also, I will have to totally plug Emu oil at this point.  It truly is a miracle worker.  Schell and her Mother have introduced me to all products Emu.  
I had no idea it was such a natural cure-all.  It will treat Eczema, Psoriasis, burns, dry skin, fine lines and wrinkles, and even insect bites and Rosacea. 
I use it under my eyes and on my cuticles.  I’ve recently been using it on my feet as well and you can ask the other DB’s,  I have “hooves” really more than feet.  I’ve been plagued by a lifetime of ashy, cracked and dry heels and let’s not even get started on my toes.  I’ve seen better looking feet on a 90 year old man.  In a casket.
Well, I’m pleased to announce that thanks to Emu oil, my precious little ballerina feet have never looked better.

See for yourself!

BEFORE
AFTER



Told ya it works miracles.*

Thanks to Schell and her folks for a wonderful getaway.  The fresh country air made my heart happy and my soul, as always, is a little shinier.




* if any of you would like to order any products from the farm please let me know and I’ll be more than happy to get you ordering information!

2 thoughts on “The Drunkard went down to Georgia.

  1. Oh yes I agree… baby goats are adorable.. and the noises they make are hilarious! When I was a young teen my mother took us all to her friends goat farm in Oregon. So, yes, I've milked a goat!And since I work in the breastfeeding industry I automatically assume the baby goat is doing something in the nursing process to irritate the mother… probably tickling or hurting… some just don't have the tolerance for that! lol

  2. HA HA HA 90 year old man in a casket!!! I snorted!

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