Whew. Y’all things have been nuts at the Corrupted household so again I apologize for my absence.
First of all, my Father in Law has been hospitalized and it’s been a day to day situation. In a last ditch effort to save his life, his left leg was amputated last week. He’s stable, but we are just taking it one day at a time. Secondly, I got rear-ended (and not in a good way) a week and a half ago so I’ve been dealing with all of that nonsense. Body shops, insurance companies and oh, this.
PT Cruiser – Ghetto Version
This is what the car rental place gave me. Seriously? Talk about looking like you’re a total douche, driving this thing removes all doubt. I hate it and I tell myself that people inherently know it’s a rental and no one is judging me, because seriously? WHO WOULD DRIVE THIS ON PURPOSE?
Last week we had to attend the “Gingerbread” program at the elementary school as our youngest was participating. I’m notsogood at these things. I find them incredibly painful. Mostly it’s because the only thing I like less than children are their parents. As soon as the program started everyone’s arms raised and there were iPhones and recorders everywhere. Really? You people actually want to live through this again? Because it was all I could do to not slam my forehead into the cinderblock walls that were holding me up. Clearly I am a drunken hillbilly with a heart full of hate.
In other news, the other day Ella (age 6) was coughing her head off so I instructed her to grab some cough syrup from the bathroom and bring it to me to administer. She came back befuddled as we have quite a selection. I glanced up from my magazine and said ” honey, the one with the shot glass on top”.
She immediately brought me the correct syrup. The one with the MEASURING CUP on top. Jesus. Stepmom of the year, here!
I have so much more to tell you but it will simply have to be another post. Let me leave you with this ridiculous thought.
I’m not sure what terrifies me more, Tilda Swinton or the McRib sandwich. I’m oddly fixated with both these days but know that I don’t want either one near my mouth.